Conflict Resolution Part Two: Weathering the Storm

Sometimes, when conflict arises, we find the best thing to do is nothing.  This is what we call "weathering the storm."  When conflict arises we just hold in there and hope that things pass.  All things must pass, right?  This is the most passive method of conflict resolution.  There are two ways that the conflict will end here. Either the conflict will resolve itself, or someone else will resolve it.

It may be best to just let the conflict take care of itself.  Take, for instance, a case where one is trying to get their college degree.  School is expensive so they need to take a job to afford tuition.  The combination of work and school gives them absolutely no free time to join that competitive backgammon league.  Despite things being difficult, there really isn't any good solution to allow the student to do all three things.  The best thing to do is just "hang in there."  Time will pass and the situation will resolve itself. The young student will have plenty of time someday to play backgammon.  For now it's best to just stick with the things that are a higher priority.

Other times we can't resolve the conflict.  Our conflict may be driven by somebody else's issues.  Perhaps we have a conflict with a friend.  That friend is going through some stuff which is carrying over into our relationship.  We can't solve our friend's problems.  Our friend has to solve his own problems.  We may decide that we just want to "hang in there" until things get better.  If we have faith in our friend, this shouldn't be too difficult.  This doesn't mean that we should just sit there idle. We can help our friend the best we can.  We can be supportive.  This can be difficult for us to handle because we do not have any control over the resolution of this conflict.  We have to rely on somebody else's strength.  Therefore, if the conflict can't be resolved it is important to understand that it is not our fault.  We hung in there as long as we could.  At some point we have to pack it in.  How far ahead that is depends on both our inner strength and our desire to keep holding on.