I think that having an ego can be a good thing. Clearly, when we are backed with self confidence, our actions will be carried out with more force and precision. Without an ego, a person may be too meek to act, and miss out on good opportunity. If we take a look at World War II's great fighter aces and the 1960's great astronauts we can see that just about all of them had egos. Pappy Boyington (Flying Tigers pilot and leader of the Black Sheep Squadron (yes, that show was based on fact)) was known to have a terribly strong ego. It was that ego and his God given talent combined that allowed him to act quickly and confidently and shoot down 26 Japanese planes and go on to win the Medal of Honor. If we control our ego we can use it to enhance our decision making ability and exude a confidence that will make others more likely to believe and agree with us.
The issue with ego is that, unlike basic self confidence, modesty is not paired well with it. The egotistical man is often seen as an elitist. Nobody says that they like an elitist, but I believe that there is a bit of elitism hiding inside of all of us. You don't have to admit it, but at least think about it. I know I can feel that way. I'm a refined, educated gentleman, and I often think that puts me ahead of the pack sometimes. At the same time, I don't treat people any differently or even look down on them (I believe everybody has a right to follow their dreams and desires); I just believe that I am more geared for success. I'm not much different from most other people (you included, probably). So why, hate the egotist? Because he is a pompous nerf-herder? I think that's the most common reason; nobody likes a pompous person.
Let's look back again at the fighter pilots and astronauts. These men were larger than life figures -- American heroes. They were afraid of nothing. They were always willing to push the limit. These men had egos so strong that they believed that with their skill, they could do the impossible. Sometimes they did. And for that, we will be reading their names in history books for centuries to come. If we look at their personal lives, they weren't so successful. Most of their marriages ended in divorce. Many of them struggled from depression and alcohol abuse in later years. It's at this point I discovered the main difference between having an ego and being self confident. Ego is not a super form of self confidence, in fact it has very little self confidence.
The ego develops when a man has a very strong sense of self confidence in one particular area. Like the astronauts, they believe that they can do their job better than anybody else on the planet. They don't feel as confident in other aspects of life. In fact, they might even feel afraid. To counter balance these fears, they over emphasize their slice of confidence until it develops into a full blown ego -- a mask. The devote all of their time to it, and let everything else fall by the wayside. At first this doesn't seem like a problem. But the day will come when their skill will no longer be needed. It is then that they finally feel useless and alone.
The self confident man, is comfortable with everything that he does. He is able to balance his whole life with success. Wouldn't we rather be like that? It's much more difficult, and it isn't as flashy as being the egotistical hero, but it will lead to more happiness. Don't get too wrapped up with the hero mentality; be the modest self confident man. As the great General Boyington once said, "show me a hero and I'll prove he's a bum."
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